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Ramadan In2macy .. Don't lose it!

Ramadan In2macy

Welcome the blessed month of Ramadan.. and what a joyous, spiritual, heart warming month we are entering inshaAllah. 

But with it's immense rewards and closeness to Allah, comes the tests and trials for us all. 
Especially the married muslims .. 
Suddenly we are hit with the month where sexual intercourse is prohibited for 17 hours.. following that those few hours for terawih and night prayers.. so the struggle is real (and we totally understand!)

And as for our husbands out there... yes the struggle is hard! 

Read the Porn Addict Blog!

To avoid.. or to not avoid.. 

There is this idea that suddenly during this month, your spouse is now HARAM to you! Stay away! Even looking at each other may result in breaking your fast. 
But this idea and notion has just gone from what you are prohibited to do into something far extreme. 

At a month of greater connection with your Lord, should you not take advantage of the one who you have completed HALF your DEEN with to bring that spirituality to an even higher level? 

 

The TRUTH

Al-Bukhaari (1927) and Muslim (1106) narrated that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to kiss and be intimate when fasting, and he was the most able of you to control his desire.” 

Al-Sindi said: 

The word yubaashir (translated here as “be intimate”) means touching the wife’s skin and her touching him, such as putting his cheek against hers and so on. 

What is meant here is touching the skin, not intercourse.

WOOHOO! That breaks the 'Touch me not for 30 days' extreme idea! 

Control 

The main thing to remember is knowing that 'control of desires'. 
The Prophet PBUH was the best of us to be able to control his desires. 

Everyone has their own limit - for some people it may be that actually sharing the bed with their wife is too much to handle and they will ejaculate. 
A man who is observing an obligatory fast is not permitted to do anything with his wife that will lead to ejaculation

Therefore you need to know your limit. 

You may hug your wife, kiss her and even cuddle in bed - as long as you know your limit. 

Now this also goes for the married women - you also have your sexual desires. SO you need to know your limit as to what you can control before you are overtaken by your desires. 

Why you SHOULD be in2mate! 

Now theres a reason why I brought you back to the 'Porn addict' blog. 
And that is because ultimately, and UNFORTUNATELY we live in a society where the nudity, obscene and sexual imagery in almost everything can not be escaped. 
Even the most pious of pious will agree that there is a battle we face with having to control our gaze and desires - 

Now Alhamdulillah for those who have overcome that obstacle by marrying the one of their dreams. However now being in the month of Ramadan, where the sexual need is not fulfilled all the time and resisting that temptation - this battle is even harder now! 

Where we may have been used to having that evening together - physically being intimate - that time and way you spend it has to be changed. We do all this for Allah swt and this reward is greater than we can imagine inshaAllah. 

BUT.. the need for a wife and husband to continue to be in2mate is so vital. I have spoken again and again (and again!) about the build up of intimacy. 

Sex is not a simple case of wham bham thank you mam! Building that love, romance and eager need to just want to be in each other's company is so important as it is the KEY that makes YOU different from any other sexualised image out there. 

During this blessed month, why not earn extra reward by sharing time together, continuing to be the coolness of each others eyes. 

Why not help ease the hardships of feeling the thirst, hunger and fatigue.. a simple smile, light hearted conversation, a normality routine of being there for each other can remind your spouse that you truly are there to support. 

I've read many articles about husband and wife sharing islamic activities together - learning hadiths, teaching quran verses etc and MashaAllah if you can do that then that's great!

(I am not judging here but this all sounds great in an ideal world... and honestly for myself.. I don't have the time and energy and as for my spiritual time I like to keep to myself!.. each to their own! ) 

But your time together does not have to be solely focused on 'ramadan activities'. The reward is still there for continuing to be the amazing wife or husband you are! Any little thing you do to please your spouse can only lead to great reward, and any deed in Ramadan is great!
 

What you can do... 

Dress nicely for each other - remind your spouse the true beauty he has! (watch the vlog to find out more)

Welcome each other with salaam and a smile! 

TALK TALK and TAAALK! general conversation and banter fills a house with so much joy and love. 

Within your own 'control limit' - Hug your spouse.. kiss them when they come home (be that on the cheek or fore head) 

Do something special to show your appreciation.  YES we recommend you do not completely ABSTAIN for 30 days.. there are still non fasting hours where you can fulfil your desires.. it is HALAL too, so do not be scared! 

ALSO.. yes we are open during Ramadan so all orders will be shipped as normal! 

Little reminders of what will come... As everyone prepares their eid gifts.. remind him of his OWN special eid gift (that no one can ever have except him!) 

Really be prepared to treat and surprise! 

So please do not hide away from your spouse.. fulfil each others needs and desires and continue to show your love. 

We hope this all helped and as always, any questions please do email and we will be happy to assist! 

Enjoy the blessed month of Ramadan and remember to keep us and the ummah in your duas! 


Tahmina

In2mate Nights 


PS. Do NOT let the hunger and frustration lead to arguments! Be sure to deal with any disagreements. Watch the first vlog for more info! 
 

Happy to help.

For any questions on in2macy please email
in2mate.nights@gmail.com

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